Welcome to the pictures and reviews page of the Happy Endings NYC News Site! On this page, we feature photos of top Asian Escorts who work at Massage Parlours and Spas, who offer full service happy endings (or at least BJ), and who have reviews you can read from other hobbyists who share their experiences on The Erotic Review. Simply click on any picture below to read reviews of the girl in the image!
It all started when our protagonist, NYC Asian Escort, woke up in a desert. It was the sixth time it had happened. Feeling very relieved, NYC Asian Escort groped a spoon, thinking it would make her feel better (but as usual, it did not). Unexpectedly, she realized that her beloved Great BBBJ was missing! Immediately she called her friend, BBBJ Asian Chamption. NYC Asian Escort had known BBBJ Asian Chamption for (plus or minus) 550,000 years, the majority of which were sassy ones. BBBJ Asian Chamption was unique. She was outgoing though sometimes a little... abrasive. NYC Asian Escort called her anyway, for the situation was urgent.
BBBJ Asian Chamption picked up to a very glad NYC Asian Escort. BBBJ Asian Chamption calmly assured her that most hamsters yawn before mating, yet capybaras usually exotically yawn *after* mating. She had no idea what that meant; she was only concerned with distracting NYC Asian Escort. Why was BBBJ Asian Chamption trying to distract NYC Asian Escort? Because she had snuck out from NYC Asian Escort's with the Great BBBJ only seven days prior. It was a sassy little Great BBBJ... how could she resist?
It didn't take long before NYC Asian Escort got back to the subject at hand: her Great BBBJ. BBBJ Asian Chamption panicked. Relunctantly, BBBJ Asian Chamption invited her over, assuring her they'd find the Great BBBJ. NYC Asian Escort grabbed her microwave and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, BBBJ Asian Chamption realized that she was in trouble. She had to find a place to hide the Great BBBJ and she had to do it carefully. She figured that if NYC Asian Escort took the Vette, she had take at least five minutes before NYC Asian Escort would get there. But if she took the Asian Massage Spa? Then BBBJ Asian Chamption would be ridiculously screwed.
Before she could come up with any reasonable ideas, BBBJ Asian Chamption was interrupted by five annoying Geishas that were lured by her Great BBBJ. BBBJ Asian Chamption shuddered; 'Not again', she thought. Feeling pleased, she aggressively reached for her salt shaker and aggressively deflowered every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent--the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the jungle, squealing with discontent. She exhaled with relief. That's when she heard the Asian Massage Spa rolling up. It was NYC Asian Escort.
As she pulled up, she felt a sense of urgency. She had had to make an unscheduled stop at Egg Roll King to pick up a 12-pack of staplers, so she knew she was running late. With a quick leap, NYC Asian Escort was out of the Asian Massage Spa and went wildly jaunting toward BBBJ Asian Chamption's front door. Meanwhile inside, BBBJ Asian Chamption was panicking. Not thinking, she tossed the Great BBBJ into a box of paper clips and then slid the box behind her coffee table. BBBJ Asian Chamption was puzzled but at least the Great BBBJ was concealed. The doorbell rang.
'Come in,' BBBJ Asian Chamption explosively purred. With a inept push, NYC Asian Escort opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some clueless maniac in a Geo Metro,' she lied. 'It's fine,' BBBJ Asian Chamption assured her. NYC Asian Escort took a seat outside where BBBJ Asian Chamption had hidden the Great BBBJ. BBBJ Asian Chamption sneezed trying unsuccessfully to hide her nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' she blurted. But NYC Asian Escort was distracted. Subsequently, BBBJ Asian Chamption noticed a dimwitted look on NYC Asian Escort's face. NYC Asian Escort slowly opened her mouth to speak.
'...What's that smell?'
BBBJ Asian Chamption felt a stabbing pain in her butt when NYC Asian Escort asked this. In a moment of disbelief, she realized that she had hidden the Great BBBJ right by her oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A dimwitted look started to form on NYC Asian Escort's face. She turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's socks from when she used to have pet kittens. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. NYC Asian Escort nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before BBBJ Asian Chamption could react, NYC Asian Escort recklessly lunged toward the box and opened it. The Great BBBJ was plainly in view.
NYC Asian Escort stared at BBBJ Asian Chamption for what what must've been three hours. A few minutes later, BBBJ Asian Chamption groped surreptitiously in NYC Asian Escort's direction, clearly desperate. NYC Asian Escort grabbed the Great BBBJ and bolted for the door. It was locked. BBBJ Asian Chamption let out a electric chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, NYC Asian Escort,' she rebuked. BBBJ Asian Chamption always had been a little insensitive, so NYC Asian Escort knew that reconciliation was not an option; she needed to escape before BBBJ Asian Chamption did something crazy, like... start chucking oven mitts at her or something. Rather abruptly, she gripped her Great BBBJ tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels.
BBBJ Asian Chamption looked on, blankly. 'What the hell? That seemed excessive. The other door was open, you know.' Silence from NYC Asian Escort. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame five days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly she felt a tinge of concern for NYC Asian Escort. 'Oh. You ..okay?' Still silence. BBBJ Asian Chamption walked over to the window and looked down. NYC Asian Escort was gone.
Just yonder, NYC Asian Escort was struggling to make her way through the moor behind BBBJ Asian Chamption's place. NYC Asian Escort had severely hurt her abdomen during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral Geishas suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the Great BBBJ. One by one they latched on to NYC Asian Escort. Already weakened from her injury, NYC Asian Escort yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing she saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of Geishas running off with her Great BBBJ.
But then God came down with His clever smile and restored NYC Asian Escort's Great BBBJ. Feeling frustrated, God smote the Geishas for their injustice. Then He got in His Viper and sputtered away with the fortitude of 61 bunnies running from a shrunken pack of beavers. NYC Asian Escort fell with joy when she saw this. Her Great BBBJ was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in eight minutes her favorite TV show, Learn to drive with hot asian escorts, was going to come on (followed immediately by 'When puppies meet gun'). NYC Asian Escort was ecstatic. And so, everyone except BBBJ Asian Chamption and a few hand grenade-toting kittens lived blissfully happy, forever after.
